Friday, September 3, 2010

Kristen Stewart “Sex Scenes” Put Site on ‘Road’ to Ridicule

Today we’re wondering about what happens when HollywoodLife editors visit the dentist.

On the one hand, they’re so numb to reality that Novocaine is probably unnecessary. But at the same time, they spout so much drivel, it has to be tough for the hygienist get a good look.

After yesterday’s mangling of Miley Cyrus comments, the clueless site returns to one of its all-time favorite activities: Fabricating drama for Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart.

HollywoodLife claims Pattinson is “freaking out” about Stewart’s “sex scenes” with On The Road co-star Viggo Mortensen.

Supposedly, the Twilight actor is so “worried about hanky panky going on during his girlfriend’s racy scenes with Viggo” that he plans to hang around the set all the time.

“There are a lot of sex scenes including a threesome, and Rob wants to make sure that it’s all pretend from the start and finish of the film,” claims a HollywoodLife “insider.”

In fact, the source adds, “He didn’t like that Kristen was even considering taking this role,” noting that as Pattinson branches out from Edward Cullen “he didn’t take on a role as risque as hers.”

Good grief.

[shaking head]

Where to begin?

For one thing, Stewart’s Marylou Moriarty character in On The Road is not involved in a string of racy scenes.

That’s kind of an important point HollywoodLife should note.

Also, Pattinson actually is taking on a rather sexual role in Bel Ami, not that Stewart or anyone else is “freaking out.”

Unlike the gang at HollywoodLife, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are adult professionals, not children. They’re quite aware that love scenes are “pretend.”

Another observation: If Pattinson didn’t spend time on Stewart’s set, HollywoodLife would probably use his absence to start a rumor that he was jealous of Mortensen and upset about their relationship. No matter what he or Stewart do, the site will find some way of twisting it into nonsense.

We’re no dentists, but it’s pretty clear that HollywoodLife bites.

source

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